Some people like to betatest games, while others don't. Prior to the European Wrath of the Lich King Beta, I was proudly a member of the first half, but after that rentless mass murder of common sense, patience and last bits of humanity, I decided to take a break, keep my sweat inside and let it loose only when the actual game comes out.



But things are about to change. And not because it's yet another Blizzard game, but because Starcraft is one of those little jewels that made college life (ignoring retarded individuals, skipping exams and such) much more easy to bare. It seems that, according to Blizz's Paul Sams (chief operating officer), we'll be getting our Starcraft 2 Beta “in the coming months”, so stay tuned for that extremely lucky invite. Because I bet it won't gonna be easy to get it.

Ze Source.

All those Halo Wars trailers not detailed enough for you? Well then, have some jumbo-sized screenshots exposing more detail than you'll ever see on any TV, HD or otherwise - rendering them rather useless. In this latest batch issued by Microsoft, we see a Vulture fight set alight by pink laz0r pewpew, a besieged Covenant stronghold, and a highly unimpressive pose of a Warthog caught in mid-jump.

The release of Halo Wars on Xbox 360 is still set for February 27 in Europe, and March 3 in North America.

Gayspot, the website that fires senior editors for not sucking the small dicks of sponsors (feel the Kane and Linch review, if it is still on), reports on a Q&A regarding Elemental: War of Magic, which we have announced some time ago.

As they say, the game will draw its purpose from several franchises, such as The Lord of the Rings, Master of Magic and Civilization, BUT FAILING hard at getting elements from the only TBS that really matters. I'll let you guess which one that is. It starts with “Heroes”. And it ends with " Might and Magic 3".

As usual, when we talk about Starcraft 2, we all go “WTFFFS WHY??". It is normal, and absolutely decent. Because a game that comes in three fucking parts smells like a milk cow. Even if Blizzard says it does not.

Recently, Speaking with Videogamer, Blizzard's Paul Sams started to spit so many “NOHEZ” words about this issue, that even I tend to call him a bull crap. As I said before, this merger between Activision and Blizzard will eventually lead to serious issues. We have Starcraft 2 in three parts, then Battle.Net on a pay roll, then... who knows, fucking Diablo III monthly fee, mayhap.

The fact of the matter is, it's absolutely, positively untrue about us trying to stretch it out and milk it. People think that it was a monetary driven decision. I can absolutely, positively tell you, with 100 per cent certainty, that that was not part of the conversation. I guarantee it. I give my word. There was never, ever a conversation where we said, 'let's do this because we're going to make more money'. I guarantee it. As a matter of fact the sole reason we did it was because we thought it was going to be a better experience. Anybody that says otherwise is not correct. It is absolutely not what we did it for.

Source.

If you didn't like Supreme Commander, it means you didn't like Total Annihilation. And if you didn't like Total Annihilation, and still call yourself a “strategist”, I recommend going back and playing with yourself one more time, because strategists do not need retards like you.

And now, here's the sequel, published by Square Enix and still developed by Gas Powered Games. Details are scarce, as in non-existent, but still, if the game follows in his papa's footsteps, it's gonna be two things: a great game, and an avid resource consumer. Be sure to get that new PC you have always wanted. Click for the press release: (...)

 Continue reading 'Supreme Commander 2 Announced'...

It seems that enthusiasts all over the world have to wait just a little bit more for Halo Wars, since Ensemble's X360 strategy game will be hitting the shelves in February 2009, according to Microsoft. Both in regular size and in enhanced, erected, Collector's Edition.



For those of you interested, the Collector's Edition will be, as usual, full of all kinds of stuff, both useful and useless, ranging from a Halo Wars: Genesis comic book from Graeme Devine, the game's lead designer, up until exclusive in-game shit, like a unique vehicle and a patch that allows you to start the game as a member of SOF. All this for “only” 79.99 USD.

Ensemble Studios, who are also responsible for that time consuming, brain eating and friend bashing Age of Empire series, will sadly be closing its gates after Halo Wars is up and running. I have no idea why, and I also already miss them, since they were a nice bunch of geeks.

Source.

And, since we are still lurking like (greater) shadows in the realms of Turn-Based Strategy, it is probably worth to mention Elemental: War of Magic, an incoming game from Stardock. When I say "incoming", I mean "incoming so far away, that we will probably forget about it".



We will most likely get the hands on this fantasy game not earlier than the beginning of 2010, with a public beta to start in June 2009. As usual with Stardock games, players will be able to use impulse for the game download, and beta testers will be able to give feedback, and even do some creative work in-game via the modding tools provided.

Some more screenshots here.

If you were anything like us (which, I hope for your sake, you are not), you would be extremely aroused to hear that the infamous King's Bounty, the TBS/RPG/Adventure/Thing from Katauri is about to receive an expansion.



For starters, let's just say that King's Bounty is the king and queen of awesomeness since Heroes 3 hit the shelves. Second, it is worth to mention (for all you lolicons out there), that this time around, you will spank Princess Amelie in a brand new (and possibly dangerous) land, called Teany, while she will do this, and that, and various other things (to herself, hopefully).

Although the official website is in Russian, I was able to steam up some of the features King's Bounty: Princess will hold (clickie to continue): (...)

 Continue reading 'King's Bounty Expansion INCOMING!'...

Up until several years ago, I would've shit my pants in excitement at the thought of a new Red Alert game. But now? Now here it is, and I couldn't possibly care any less about the way EA fucked up Westwood's legacy (as they did with plenty of other legacies). But hey, I figured there's still a few stubborn C&C fans out there, hanging on to their last shred of hope, as they hide among all those horny teenagers drooling over the hawt chicks pimped for the game's cinematics. So, for whatever it's worth, today marks the release shipping of Command & Conquer: Red Alert 3 to retail stores.

This longtime PC-exclusive strategy sub-series is making a bold - if not reckless - attept to conquer two power-platforms, as it launches on the PC and Xbox 360. The actual release will happen on October 30 for the PC in North America and Europe, and on November 11 for the Xbox 360. Originally there were also some suicidal plans for a PS3 version, but... not any more.

The third chapter comes precisely 8 years after Red Alert 2's release in 2000, which was expanded with Yuri's Revenge one year later. As for what Red Alert 3 brings to the table, we'll let EA do the talking. Update: We have the launch trailer as well, by the way. (...)

 Continue reading 'Red Alert 3 Launch Sequence Hits Zero'...

Blizzards's Rob Pardo, Vice President of Game Design, had a recent chat with the very versatile Sticks of Joy, clarifying for them (and for us, and for the rest of the world, actually), how's it like to be producing a single game that will ship into three separate episodes. Yes, ladies and little sisters, we are, once more, talking about Starcraft 2. Or, maybe, Starcraft 2, 3 and 4.

Last week's news about the game being split in three, due to its "massive" and "epic" content was not a pleasant one, indeed. People would have expected a final product that they can devour in one setting, but hey, the strings are being pulled in different directions. Pardo insisted on the fact that the second and third campaigns are, unlike the "original" Terran Starcraft 2, NOT being considered as separate products by Blizzard. They are, let's say, the equivalent of expansion packs, so that's why the company does not think separate release dates will affect the game's overall quality. So the only thing we will miss, while waiting to play the Protoss and the Zerg, is the singleplayer component.


About timing, Pardo had no exact figures to set to the table, but being the speculative man he is, he heralded one year time between each part of Starcraft 2. Just like they are doing with World of Warcraft, where expansions are scheduled to be released in the same way. Long story short, we will buy the game in 2009, and we will get to fully enjoy it by the end on 2011.