A new press release has come up on the Internetz, giving us some insight in the much anticipated (by desk secretaries) Sims 3. Along with a brand new engine that is bound to rock our stinky socks one way or the other (and which seems to be in development for almost three years), EA’s simulation success brags at everyone with the following things, which we will detail a bit, to give you a much deserved shade of Aran light on the matter:

New Seamless, Open Neighborhood - Explore the Neighborhood Freely.
So, you will be able to leave the house, stalk your neighbours’ daughters any way you see fit. Hopefully, such an open neighborhood means fewer locks on the little girls’ bedrooms, and more instant action for us.

New Create A Sim - Create Any Sim You Can Imagine.
…and I certainly don’t mind being a God, also in the virtual world. Sticking to different Sim personalities, like whores, pimps, serial killers and sisters of Ilidan should be a nice addition to the whole game universe. Size is also included here – you can make them small, big, fat, thin, and most especially, white.

New Unlimited Customization - Everyone Can Customize Everything!
And the blah-blah part about “OMG U CAN CHANGE IT ALL!!!!”. Fascinating. They say I can even modify window shades. Or sofas. Now that is really groundbreaking. I can always feel the urge to play this game, over and over again, while my (presumptive) girlfriend is playing around with that new wireless Nunchuk I bought her, to leave me alone.

Take-Two are continuing to keep themselves busy these days... and so are Electronic Arts' bidding artificers. Clearly incapable of waiting until the agonizing (for them) release of GTA IV at the end of April, EA is making another move in the hopes of taking over Take-Two. Only, this time, they are trying to bypass the company's board and head straight for the shareholders, luring them with an offer of $26 per share in cash. Not that tempting, but who knows... Just to be on the safe side, Take-Two's board urged its shareholders to hold their horses, promising to properly advise them within 10 business days.

So while we wait for the next chapter of this bidding saga, let's get back to Take-Two's games for a bit. My personal most-wanted, Mafia 2 is now planned for release (...)

 Continue reading 'Take-Two About Dates, Max Payne 3, New EA Bid'...

- WiiFreeloader has been released for our region-free gaming pleasure. So no matter the game's country of origin, this baby will take it for a spin, for $19.99 / £9.99. Just in time for Super Smash Bros. Brawl this March 9, which is still missing a European release date.

- There will be no GTA 4 demo. But don't worry, they're not hiding anything. Just a gangload of criminals and whores waiting to be sodomized with broken bottles of vodka. Something the whole family can look forward to this April 29. If you have 100 hours to finish it.

- And by the time the GTA fever cools out, Metal Gear Solid 4 will be coming this June 12 on the PS3, as eventually confirmed - and detailed - by Konami. European date same as US, by the way. But, alas, Blu-ray disc doesn't have enough space for MGS4! Oh well, Metal Gear Online beta begins April 21.

- Why EA rocks (and sucks) in 2008 - five reasons why Electronic Arts 'rocks', and five reasons why it 'sucks'. I could add plenty more to the latter.

- Eidos parent company SCi cancels 14 games and fires 25% of its employees, in a radical attempt to stop (or at least slow) their downfall. Tomb Raider, Deux Ex and Hitman still alive. So is Battlestations, considering last week's announcement of a sequel. Oh and Tomb Raider: Underworld "is now scheduled to launch during the 2008 Christmas season".

- THQ director blames piracy for Iron Lore closure. And hardware vendors. And reviewers. And stupid gamers. Anything but the real problem.

- 38% of gamers are female. That leaves about 60% males, and 2% emo kids?

- And finally, some new games releasing this week, including Army of Two and God of War: Chains of Olympus for the PSP. Oh, speaking of God of War... (cue sequel post).

Yes, I admit, I've been shamelessly (though strategically) slacking for the past week, leaving my comrade to face the GDC madness on his own, while I turned my perverted eye to our flat-chested sister-website Animekon (some great new stuff there lately, by the way). But all good things must come to an end, so... back to gaming.

- Chief among our bypassed GDC news was the announcement of Gears of War 2, coupled with this teaser trailer teasing at a november 2008 release. CliffyB proclaimed that it's "going to be bigger, better and far more badass than the first one", with chainsaw duels and stuff. But no Gears of War comic after all.

- More recently, Motorstorm 2 was also revealed in a BBC article. It's "due out in time for Christmas and moves the action away from the desert locale of the original. Gamers will be able to race around a lush island environment, full of interactive vegetation". Interactive... vegetation. That's super. At least it will have 4-player split-screen.

- Still, the hottest topic these days remains EA's $2 billion bid on Take-Two, which was rejected, but will be taken under consideration once again on April 30, right after the release of GTA IV (not by coincidence). Meanwhile - new Take-Two details revealed.

- This year's Leipzig Games Convention might be the last one, as from September 2009 it could effectively be replaced by a new event called GAMESCom, to be held in Cologne, Germany. The Leipzig organizers are not amused, but still hope for a GC 2009.

- Telltale has just sent along the trailer for Sam & Max episode 204: Chariots of the Dogs, which is hereby officially unravelled. But where in the world is Carmen Sandiego Bosco? Find out in mid-March.

- The next Indiana Jones action game has gone into production. Yeah, just now. But you won't see me complain, since LucasArts spent more time with Star Wars: The Force Unleashed, which looks so cool in this GDC 2008 trailer.

- Offset Software, the guys who blew our mind with their Project Offset tech demos a couple of years ago (but kept mostly silent ever since) have been acquired by Intel. Five bucks to whoever can say what this will mean for their potential game. I'm clueless.

- Molyneux despairs at the "tragic" state of PC gaming, because "The Sims and World of Warcraft [are] sucking all the air out of the PC market". And I feel like I'm right in the ventilation duct, what with patch 2.4 coming up and everything... By the way, "Cliff's an idiot!".

- As of tomorrow, February 29, Phil Harrison is no longer the president of Sony Computer Entertainment Worldwide Studios. This week he resigned from Sony after 15 frustrating years with the company, leaving his warm chair to Kaz “Riiiidge Racer!” Hirai (who also remains President and Group CEO of SCEI). Where to next, Phil boy?

Two fucking billion dollars. That’s like… holy shit, so many manga volumes that even I cannot handle them. Just think about all the booze you can buy with it. All the whores you can LEGALLY rape with it. Every spermatozoon I can possibly produce in a wanking session will have a bright future with this kind of money.

…And EA seems to have this kind of spendola, ready to roll. Target? None other than Take Two, the owners of the Grand Gay Theft Auto franchise. After all, why should only Activision be able to suck Vivendi’s extremely enlarged penis, getting a share of Blizzard’s World of Warcraft while they are at it? We know that EA means business. As in… the whole fucking gaming business. Good for them. If Take Two accepts the deal, Viacom (MTV owners who were actually trying to buy Take Two before EA started negotiations) will get owned. Big time.

Let the purchase begin!

Well, at least someone is concerned about the fate of Warhammer Online: Age of Reckoning. Stephen from Bluesnews (also known as Blue, due to the fact that he doesn’t go out much, and the ultra-violet lamps he uses to grow up weed in the basement have taken their toll on his skin), followed some earlier rumors, according to which EA’s anticipated MMORPG has been pushed by its pregnant publisher to some indefinite release date. GamesIndustry.biz were the ones who provided the said rumor.

Well, Bluesnews contacted EA and thoroughly questioned them about the presumptive delay, only to find out that Warhammer Online is still on track, and that will hit the store shelves somewhere in Q2 2008. Thank God.

Hopefully, at least this one will show up before WotLK.

Having shown the new Scrin unit "Mechapede" in a trailer earlier this month, EA is issuing this new batch of screenshots from GDC, for the Command & Conquer 3: Kane's Wrath expansion. Preetee colorz! Marching in shops this March.

In a bit of a contradiction to this week's press release announcing the PC version of Mass Effect - which credits no other studio except BioWare - it appears that indie developer Demiurge Studios is actually the one doing the dirty work of porting this Xbox 360 RPG to PCs. As spotted on FiringSquad, the Massachusetts-based developer has revealed on its blog that it "began working with BioWare during the final stretch of development for the Xbox 360 version", adding gameplay and performance enhancements for the PC version. And they also let slip a few specific details.

"Mass Effect for the PC features a third command wheel so players can access squad members separately, a new inventory system, customized key mapping and a brand new minigame. Extra attention was focused on visuals, offering higher resolution graphics for an enhanced gaming experience for the PC."

Don't forget to check out the first screenshots from Mass Effect PC, if you haven't yet.

We won't have to dig like madmen for any scans of some Hungarian preview, after all, because Electronic Arts have just announced Command & Conquer: Red Alert 3 in a nice big press release, complete with screenshots and a trailer. The first surprise we get is that EA's Los Angeles studio is developing this RTS sequel not only for the PC and Xbox 360, but also for the PlayStation 3. Next up, Red Alert 3 boasts a fully co-operative campaign set in "a breathtaking alternate future spawned by time travel run amok", while adding "an astounding new faction that will shake-up the Red Alert universe as we know it", and "bringing naval combat into the heart of the game design". Not to mention they're already hinting at the beta! But let's take them one at a time, right after these pics.


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 Continue reading 'Red Alert 3 Details, Screenshots And Trailer'...

I distinctly recall Mark Skaggs (ex-Westwood / EA Pacific) dropping the bomb in late 2004, that work on a new Red Alert game had already started at that time, so let's not call this an "announcement". Rather, it's something even better: an unexpected details blowout, incoming very soon in the printed press around the world! So far, the Hungarian PC Guru (going on sale tomorrow, February 14) and the American PC Gamer magazines are the first to have their covers invaded by the red army, paving the way for the moment we've been waiting for, ever since EA "blew it" with Westwood.

Tick-tack...

... the bomb is ticking.